What's happened over the past couple of years?

What's happened over the past couple of years?
Come and find out about my lifetime mission!
Update April 2018: It's been a while my friends - and such a lot has happened since I was last active here!

When it finally dawned on me that I had been systematically abused - and not just by one person - my whole world collapsed around me.

You see, I had always believed myself to be a strong person. Capable. Successful and somewhat sassy to boot. A fighter. Someone who could overcome any challenge, as I'd proven to myself since early childhood, time and time again. So the knockout thud of recognition that I had been a 'victim' hit me with the full force of a steam train, tsunami and earthquake rolled into one.

"How could that have happened to me? How did I let it happen? Why didn't I notice it? Why didn't I stop it, or at least speak out?"
...and then came an all engulfing darkness of shame. And then the deafening silence.

It took me years to come out of that place. Years of hard work, self reflection and excruciating pain.

Which was how, ultimately, Light Up was finally born.

Now this work is being experienced and shared by many - and is growing in numbers and momentum. And I am grateful.
Grateful not only for my own experiences, also for the fact that Light Up gives people the tools to escape from their shame and pain in far less time than it took me!

We've already worked with trafficked women, abused children and traumatised adults, successfully guiding them back to completeness (without having to relive their horrors) in as little as two sessions.

People are waking up and finding their voices. I am a firm supporter of the #metoo movement, and every other group that sheds light on and offers a platform for people to speak out and seek a complete way of living.

Yes, there is darkness in this world. Yes, there is much that has been hidden away. And yes, now people are speaking out. Thank goodness for those voices! The quiet ones. The angry ones. The sad ones. The loud ones. All have their place. All have their unique message to share. All are warriors.

I am honoured to be in service, and to play my part in reigniting this beautiful world of ours. We are coming together now. We are gathering force. And I am glad.

Fellow warriors, I salute you. I commit to continuing to stand in this arena alongside all my brothers and sisters who know there is a better way and a brighter future.

Come and find out morewww.dnalightup.net

In continued love, recognition and gratitude


Mel xxx

Tuesday, 27 November 2012

New Endings

LOVE and CARE for you , my Dearest!!!
Sitting here in my kitchen in France, I am pondering what may now lie ahead. The past few months have been, it's fair to say, a pretty strange ride even by my book - a case of fact being far stranger than fiction. But here I am now, facing another ending. This time it's the ending of what has been a good and healthy relationship, but one that has now run it's course. It's time to move on. I don't know what the future may hold, but I'm hoping that one day I will once again feel sunshine in my heart.

My time with Patrice has given me the opportunity to feel genuine love. To share. To honour boundaries. To be real. To trust feelings. To be open. To appreciate the humanness of two souls who came together and, I hope, gave and will continue to give enrichment to both our lives. From the very beginning we recognised that there were many differences between us - but through those differences we somehow found a middle ground where we both thrived.

Was it too much to expect it could last for ever? Well, perhaps. And perhaps I have had my rose tinted glasses on for much of the time - or perhaps not. I don't know. And you know what? It doesn't matter.

I do know that right from the start we have both been honest with each other, even though sometimes the honesty has not been easy. We have always said that we hoped we would both grow from this experience together. For me I know I have learned through this relationship that there are indeed 'good men' in this world - something that, perhaps, only now I can fully appreciate. Perhaps the scars from my ex had indeed run deeper than I had chosen to acknowledge - even to myself. For that was a relationship that (for me at least) seemed to be perfect, but turned out to be just a sham. Abandoned, betrayed and ashamed, there were many times I thought I'd never be able to pull through. But I did. And with Patrice I found the courage to once again open my heart - to him and to myself.

But unlike the sudden finish of my marriage, this is a new kind of ending. Because this is a mutual (if painful) acknowledgement that our relationship has run it's course. We've come to the place where over recent weeks there has been more angst than peace, and more heaviness than light. Life is worth more than that - for both of us. So it's time to be honest and face the tough reality that it's time to move on. And so we're talking. We're crying. We're sharing. And we're working through the next steps. We'll support each other, and we will both find a better world.

It isn't easy. But it's honest. And it's real. And I know that I'll carry with me all the happy memories of the good times we've had together for the rest of my life. In the words of Edith Piaf "Je ne regrette rien"

Thank you, Patrice, with all of my heart.
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