What's happened over the past couple of years?

What's happened over the past couple of years?
Come and find out about my lifetime mission!
Update April 2018: It's been a while my friends - and such a lot has happened since I was last active here!

When it finally dawned on me that I had been systematically abused - and not just by one person - my whole world collapsed around me.

You see, I had always believed myself to be a strong person. Capable. Successful and somewhat sassy to boot. A fighter. Someone who could overcome any challenge, as I'd proven to myself since early childhood, time and time again. So the knockout thud of recognition that I had been a 'victim' hit me with the full force of a steam train, tsunami and earthquake rolled into one.

"How could that have happened to me? How did I let it happen? Why didn't I notice it? Why didn't I stop it, or at least speak out?"
...and then came an all engulfing darkness of shame. And then the deafening silence.

It took me years to come out of that place. Years of hard work, self reflection and excruciating pain.

Which was how, ultimately, Light Up was finally born.

Now this work is being experienced and shared by many - and is growing in numbers and momentum. And I am grateful.
Grateful not only for my own experiences, also for the fact that Light Up gives people the tools to escape from their shame and pain in far less time than it took me!

We've already worked with trafficked women, abused children and traumatised adults, successfully guiding them back to completeness (without having to relive their horrors) in as little as two sessions.

People are waking up and finding their voices. I am a firm supporter of the #metoo movement, and every other group that sheds light on and offers a platform for people to speak out and seek a complete way of living.

Yes, there is darkness in this world. Yes, there is much that has been hidden away. And yes, now people are speaking out. Thank goodness for those voices! The quiet ones. The angry ones. The sad ones. The loud ones. All have their place. All have their unique message to share. All are warriors.

I am honoured to be in service, and to play my part in reigniting this beautiful world of ours. We are coming together now. We are gathering force. And I am glad.

Fellow warriors, I salute you. I commit to continuing to stand in this arena alongside all my brothers and sisters who know there is a better way and a brighter future.

Come and find out morewww.dnalightup.net

In continued love, recognition and gratitude

Mel xxx

Friday, 22 July 2011

Magnets And Mischief

"I've learned so much from my mistakes... I'm thinking of making a few more!"

I'm not normally a great fan of fridge magnets, but I couldn't resist buying the one with those words on it. It sits proudly on my cooker extractor - and brings a wry smile to my face each time I see it. Because right now, I have the wind in my tail (an old expression my mother used to use) and I can feel some mischief brewing. Nothing major, nothing like some of the really ridiculous antics I have been known to get up to - nope, this is a different feeling. And I like it!

This morning, for example, I woke up late after a wonderful evening last night chatting with a new friend who decided to pop round and see me on a whim. I have known him for a while, but we suddenly seem to have found a deeper connection... hmmm... perhaps that's why I'm feeling slightly coquettish today? Anyway, back to this morning. I woke up late as I said and, rather than feeling guilty about it, I decided to enjoy the moment and make the most of the free time I seem to be enjoying at the moment. So I stayed in bed a good while longer, reading emails and checking the news on my iPhone. I then took a leisurely shower, got dressed and came downstairs to make a cup of tea.

Nothing cheeky in that, you may be thinking. Well, you'd be right - but then I haven't explained what has been happening over the past few days. Neither have I explained my thought processes, or my growing determination to stand up taller and fight my corner.

In the past, you see, I have often chosen to behave "like a good girl" when it comes to my own battles. Like so many of us, I had believed that if I was to project enough kindness, respect and love in to a situation, it would heal of it's own accord. I still hold with that opinion - and yet at the same time I've also learned that there are alternative choices available to me. I've learned that sometimes, sometimes, just turning the other cheek isn't always the best solution. And this is why I have the wind in my tail.

Since joining Lovefraud, the hits on this blog have gone through the roof (thank you to everyone who has been reading, and thanks also for the emails... it means a huge amount to me). Among those hits, however, are a concentrated number coming from... him. Now, I can't be certain, but the signs are there and I'm pretty sure that once again I am back on his radar. The last time this happened, I wrote a post that was specifically directed at him. After it was published, the hits stopped - coincidence? I don't think so.

This time, though, my reaction is different. Now I am in a different place and I have learned so much more. I am stronger. I am more confident - not just outwardly, but on the inside as well. After all, haven't I proved that I have made it against the odds and despite his best efforts to thwart me? Right now there are a few lose ends that still need tying up - for obvious reasons I will not go in to details here at the moment, but when everything is done and dusted I will happily share the strategies I've been employing to deal with the impossible.

So as I said, this time my reaction is different. I don't care whether or not he is scouring my blog. I am not rising to the bait in the same way. This time I am biding my time - and this is where the mischief comes in to the story. A short while ago, during another chat with my friend Beatrix, she advised me to realign myself with the female warrior archetypes. This is a subject that has fascinated me over the past couple of years as I'm sure you can imagine.

Probably the most legendary female warriors are the Amazon tribe - this is a description I found online:

Women have long been defenders of their families, and the Amazon tribe of Warrior Women has become legendary because of their ability to engage in fierce battle--even sacrificing part of their female physique to facilitate warfare. Loyalty to the family and tribe is among the Amazon's notable characteristics, along with nurturing their young and transmitting lessons of power and self-defense. In today's society, the Warrior Woman has emerged in its glory once again through women who liberate and protect others, especially women and children who need vocal and financial representation.

Although I don't intend to cut off any part of my body, I am certainly prepared to take on the mantle of an Amazon warrior - to defend my family and go in to battle. Because this time I am ready to change my approach and work with my inner warrior. Today I feel filled with a sense of mischievous confidence. There is no longer any need for me to sharpen weapons or prepare myself against the threat of an onslaught. No, that is all behind me now. But I do feel the invitation to step up and stay alert - and to chose stealth and strategy above passive acceptance.

As I said at the beginning, I have the wind in my tail and a glint in my eye. I do not yet know the process I am going to employ - but I do know that it will come as a surprise for my adversary. I also know it will be final. No-body and no-thing is ever going to threaten me ever again. I am ready - so those who wish me harm had better watch their backs. They may not know where, when or how I'm going to make my move, but they'll certainly know when I've done it. They can run but they cannot hide - because I'm ready, and I'm not afraid anymore.

Hmmm... this could be fun...

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