April 2016: After three years away from this blog I'm back. It was originally started so I could make sense of the madness that ensued after my marriage to a sociopath. Much has changed, grown and been created since then - including reclaiming my full birth name Melanie Pledger.
My voice has become stronger, and so has my mission. I'm here on this earth to share the life-changing magic that developed as a result of my personal journey overcoming abuse, abandonment, manipulation and betrayal. I've learned that many of the rules we've been taught about life are fundamentally wrong. They've been misunderstood by most, misused by some, and deliberately misdirected by the manipulators who live and breathe among us. I've also learned that it's easier and more enjoyable than people think to shift things around...
Now I know there was a reason for it all. So now I'm back to fill in the gaps. To share what I've discovered, and dispel the myths that don't serve us... I look forward to reconnecting with old friends, and discovering new ones.
Thank you for being here.
Mel xxx

Wednesday, 27 January 2010

Well Well Well...

English: Pier at Maraetai Beach, in greater Au...
... no, not the three holes in the ground. Just a wry smile on my face because things really are now moving forward. I really AM free. And I've just received a telephone call out of the blue, that I've taken as a big sign that all is well.

It was from Doug, an amazingly kind and talented guy we did all our best training with when we were running the business. I always thought of Doug as a friend, not just a work colleague, and I was gutted when we drifted apart (now I realise this was Cam's influence, but that doesn't matter now). Chatting to him on the phone after what, two years? Three years even? It felt as though time had just melted away, and I felt the connection once again. Only yesterday he had heard through the grapevine that Cam and I had separated, but didn't know the details. So he immediately called, much to my surprise and delight. And as I explained what had happened, I felt his support and understanding beaming towards me. Once again, more support, more good people - another person who had been kept away, but who can now return. He told me that he married his beautiful girlfriend just before Christmas, and I am so chuffed for both of them. It's wonderful news!

So many more things are also slipping in to place. Strange coincidences seem to be happening, and I feel that I'm in the 'flow' that I've read about and searched for since I first started on my journey of self-development. This time, though, the movement is effortless. My only job now is to relax, accept and quite literally "go with the flow" for things are unfolding in so many glorious ways right in front of my eyes.

You may have read in an earlier post about the unexpected kindness of a friend? Well, as a result of that kindness I was able to visit my solicitor last week. And it turns out that I might just be in a better position than I could have imagined. So that's good.

I was also able to collect new passports for both myself and Dylan - on the same day, when I was told it would take longer! Our surname is now officially back to my maiden name again, which makes a massive psychological difference.

I met some amazing people last week, and now the opportunities for work are even better and more exciting than I could possibly have imagined! And I was absolutely flabbergasted by the links and coincidences that continued to present themselves as the week progressed. So much so that, on the train home on Thursday evening, I could not contain my happiness! Smiling like a Cheshire cat, and unable to concentrate on the newspaper in front of me, my bizarre antics prompted a fellow passenger to approach me when I left the train, telling me I'd cheered him up as he'd never seen anyone look so happy....!!!

And then just a couple of days ago, one of my best friends in the whole wide world was given the good news that he'd secured the job he so dearly wanted - and deserved. For him, that marks the end of a very trying two years - so we celebrated together! Matt and his lovely wife have both been with me every step of the way, as have I with them through their trials. And we regularly share a philosophical conversation over a few glasses of wine, trying to make sense of these testing times.

Last night was no exception. This time, though, the philosophical conversation was positive as we focused on the things we've learned over the past few months. It seemed no coincidence that we were both suddenly back in similar circumstances to when we first met ten years ago. Specifically that he was just taking a new job as MD of a radio station, and that I was just pulling together a new training business. OK, things are not quite the same, but the similarities are there without question. So we asked the question "Had so much changed in that time after all?" and the response was a resounding "YES!". 

We both remembered that at that time, we were happy and excited about our lives in every sense of the world. We were at the top of our game, and we both achieved amazing results in our careers. We spoke the same language that we use today, we had the same dreams - so how come so much had 'gone wrong' over the past few years? And what had changed?

Chortling at the sudden 'ah-ha moment' that this prompted in both of us, we agreed that somehow the vibration has changed. It's difficult to put in to words, but somehow the energy and belief is now rooted and safe. It's now solid - through and through.  It's not floating in the wind, nor shooting off in all directions. We were no longer looking outside for the answers, or for more input. Now we were looking inwards, and noticing the differences.

And then we hit on the next realisation. Remembering the fantastic results we both achieved back then, just imagine the results we can now achieve, with the added wisdom and calm that we've both gained over the past few years? Now THAT'S inspiring. THAT'S something to leap out of bed for in the morning. THAT'S something to get really excited about.

I was asked a couple of days ago if I was "hungry" - meaning was I keen to get out there and make a difference. Absolutely I am! This time, though, no matter how hungry I may be, I won't stop at the first junk-food outlet I find - not even for a second. I'll select my food and service wisely. I'll take my time and choose calmly, with the inner peace and knowing that I DO have options, and that I DO deserve the best. This time I'll be patient and trust that the best is destined for me, no matter how things might appear on the outside. I'll be open to new opportunities and I'll accept the ones that serve me the best. For if I can survive through a year like 2009 and come through smiling, then I can certainly thrive in 2010 and beyond.

Neale Donald Walsche puts it this way: "Life works out in the process of Life Itself. All you have to do is trust that it will, and allow it to."

As I said right in the beginning.... well well well.... and you know what? It jolly well is.

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